The Magic 8 Ball is such a staple of American culture that not a week goes by without it being mentioned in the mainstream media. At least, it seems that way to me. So, in order to test that theory I plan to share all of the news articles I find each week that mention our favorite telepathic toy.
News Articles from September 20th to September 26th, 2009-
Water on (shakes Magic 8 ball) Mars this time-
Discover Magazine
Hard on the heels of the water-on-the-Moon announcement comes news of water on Mars (there’s also a press release).
Position Ranks Preview, Week 3-
Yahoo! Sports
Make no mistake: If you feel that it’s necessary to commit to a fantasy lineup before the weekend, then you’re kind of a fool. Please wait until Sunday morning to make the big decisions. Get your hands on the inactives list. Watch some Fantasy Football Live. Have a Pop-Tart. Consult the Magic 8-Ball. Develop a ritual, then respect the ritual. But don’t make the tough calls until the last possible moment, after you’ve processed all available information.
Chris Sligh disses ‘American Idol’ alums: I die inside.-
Entertainment Weekly
…But let’s move on to this egregious and unnecessary harsh piece of advice. FALSE: “You’re not going to be successful.” Chris, that must be one pessimistic Magic 8-Ball you’ve got lying around your room. FALSE: “You’re not going to be millionaires (with the exception of MAYBE Kris and Adam).” Maybe? Maybe? Say that to Glambert nation. And you’re crazy to leave season 8 contestants like Allison and Danny Gokey off your list. Maybe it’s just my optimistic Magic 8-Ball talking — I do most of my shopping in Shangri-La — but Allison is capable of awesome success. And with a country album underway, Danny Gokey’s future is sure looking bright…
Bradley’s statement almost as lame as the decision to sign him-
Chicago Tribune
This is how a bad deal gets worse. So, let that be a lesson to all you little GMs out there: Never make free-agent decisions based on the advice of a Magic 8-Ball.
Climate Week kicks off in New York with bigwigs and big hopes-
The Guardian (UK)
While climate is not formally on the G20’s agenda, some are hoping that President Obama will come off his speech at the New York event ready to signal to other world leaders that the U.S. will lead on forging a strong replacement to the Kyoto Protocol treaty to reduce greenhouse-gas emissions, which expires in 2013. Its successor is supposed to be largely finalized at December’s global-warming talks.
How likely is Obama to do that? As the Magic 8-Ball might say, “Reply hazy; try again.”
Indications Are Good-
iStockAnalyst
The Magic 8-Ball of Stats Canada’s Leading Indicators Index seems to suggest that we have entered a recovery from the great Financial Apocalypse of 2009 (trademark pending).
Fall’s new TV shows: To TiVo or not to TiVo?-
The News Tribune
“Eastwick,” starts at 10 p.m. Wednesday on ABC: This TV version of “The Witches of Eastwick” is just as confusing, convoluted and icky as the 1987 film, but with Rebecca Romijn and Lindsay Price instead of Cher, Susan Sarandon, Michelle Pfeiffer and Jack Nicholson. Does that sound like an appealing trade to you?
TiVo or Ti-NO? Can a series based on a 1984 book about three unknowing witches and the devil who romances them work? My Magic 8 Ball racks up a Ti-NO.
Seeking answers? Just check the Almanac, Jack-
Tallahassee Democrat
As far as weather forecasting, the ‘Nac had this to say about Florida’s summer of ‘10: “It will be cooler and rainier than normal, with the hottest periods in early-to-mid- and mid-to-late August. Watch for a major hurricane in late August or early September.”
Uh, I know that the ‘Nac has been at this prediction game since Abe Vigoda wore Huggies but, come on, my 10-year-old nephew, Hub Cub, wouldn’t even have to drag out his Magic 8-Ball to make that call.
San Francisco turns vacant storefronts into inspiring works of art-
San Francisco Examiner
Among the initial storefronts to be unveiled is a thought-provoking piece by the San Francisco design firm MINE™. In a darkened storefront a neon sign proclaiming, “Everything is OK” will hover above rows of canned “products” that promise instant “OK-ness.” According to Mine’s founder and creative director Christopher Simmons, “The installation is designed as a provocation through which passersby are challenged to explore their relationship to the status quo and the term ‘OK.’ Does ‘OK’ signify ‘good’ or merely mediocre? If everything is mediocre, is that what we’re being asked to accept?”
This installation could not be more appropriate as the world sits with bated breath wondering, “Is the economy improving? Is everything OK?” With innovative economic revitalization efforts like this one, I don’t know about you, but my little black Magic 8-Ball reads “outlook good.” So let’s go shopping…window-shopping that is! And hey, more good news, it won’t cost a dime.
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- Keith Urban and the Magic 8 Ball Score: 6
- Attn: Columnists – Need Filler? Write About The Magic 8 Ball! Score: 4
